When Online Dating Falls Short
What to do when it isn’t working for you
Don’t get me wrong, I think online dating services definitely have their place and I’m for anything proactive to get you out of your comfort zone. It’s a great way to meet like minded people and consumers have a vast selection of dating sites to choose from. No matter what your background and hobbies are, for a reasonable amount of money (or even for free) there are lots of options to choose from.
However there are some serious shortcomings that come along with online dating. People can easily pretend to be someone they’re not and embellish themselves. Lying about age, height, weight, income and posting pictures that aren’t current is common. What you see is definitely not always what you get and humans are often way too quick to dismiss someone who could be great for them. Sifting through profiles that show promise is time consuming and can become a part-time job. The analogy used in a Psychological Journal was online dating was akin to shopping for a car. Faced with too many options people are often poised on who’s next and eyeing the bigger, better deal. Even after narrowing the field, the profiles don’t factor in life experiences, it can be two-dimensional and you can spend hours emailing and chatting only to discover something about them that is a deal breaker. At the end of the day, only a face to face encounter can predict chemistry. Often, people can’t break free of their past patterns or get out of their own way and habit of picking the wrong person for them.
So what do you do when online dating services aren’t working for you? There are a lot of different options you can explore, it’s not a one size fits all solution so pick what resonates with you. You can go to events or classes, go to a co-ed gym, walk a dog and engage in friendly discussion with people you meet. You never know who someone else may know so chat up everyone and expand your social circles. My personal favourite of course is to work with a Matchmaker. Having someone actively scouting and searching, pre-screening and weeding through a pool of candidates to get the highest calibre prospects who meet your criteria is a game changer. Making sure that what you see is what you get and finding your type while protecting your privacy is part of the process; as well as ensuring that you present your best foot forward and avoid past mistakes.
And one last question – you go to a dentist to fix your teeth, use a personal trainer to up your fitness level and have a financial planner to manage your money, why not have a Matchmaker to be the catalyst to change your love life?