Blog & Dating Tips | Divine Matchmaking

Stop Searching for Perfect: Why Saying “Yes” to Possibility Can Lead You to Real Love

In today’s dating world, it’s easy to get caught up searching for the perfect one. When new clients come to our matchmaking agency, they often have a detailed checklist — from appearance and hobbies to career goals and lifestyle. But the truth is, perfection doesn’t exist.

At our matchmaking firm, we see it time and time again: great potential matches get overlooked because someone’s photo didn’t spark instant attraction or they didn’t meet every box on a list. Yet real chemistry isn’t something you can measure on paper — it’s something you feel in person.

The True Goal of a First Date

A first date isn’t about deciding whether someone is your forever person. It’s about seeing if you’d like to go on a second one.

Instead of focusing on whether they’re “the one,” try asking yourself, “How do I feel when I’m with them?” or “Would I like to learn more about this person?” The goal is to build momentum, not perfection. Genuine connection takes time to unfold.

Say Yes More Often

We always encourage our clients to look for reasons to say yes, not no. Photos and bios are such loose barometers — they only tell part of the story. The real magic happens in person, when you can see someone’s energy, hear their laugh, and feel how comfortable you are together.

These days, people shop for a partner the same way they’d shop for a car — wanting the perfect model with all the bells and whistles. But love isn’t built that way. No one is flawless, and holding out for “perfect” can mean missing out on someone truly wonderful.

Give People a Chance

The daters who find success are the ones who stay open, curious, and willing to give things a try. They build momentum — saying yes to a first coffee, a second dinner, and a third walk in the park. Because the right connection grows over time, not instantly. Allow someone time to show you who they are.

Before you dismiss someone because they don’t fit every detail of your ideal image, give them (and yourself) a real chance. Say yes to meeting up. Yes to exploring. Yes to seeing how you feel.

We’ve seen many couples start with hesitation. Some even said “no” at first, but after a little encouragement to meet, they ended up in committed long-term relationships. People often fall in love with someone they may not have initially pictured.

Because love doesn’t usually arrive in a perfect package. It shows up when you’re open enough to recognize it.

Ready to Find Real Love?

Finding love isn’t about chasing perfection — it’s about giving connection a chance to grow. If you’re tired of endless swiping and are ready to meet someone genuine, our professional matchmakers can help.

At Divine Intervention Matchmaking, we introduce successful, commitment-minded singles across Vancouver, Toronto, Calgary, Edmonton, and beyond who are serious about finding meaningful relationships.

Take the first step today — your person might be closer than you think!

➡️ Book a Complimentary Matchmaking Consultation
➡️ Learn How Our Dating Coaches Can Help You Succeed

Fall Into Love: 5 Reasons Why Autumn is the Perfect Season to Refresh Your Dating Life

As the leaves turn vibrant shades and the air becomes crisp, autumn signals a fresh start and what better time to revitalize your love life? Fall is more than just sweater weather and falling leaves; it’s also the beginning of cuffing season, when singles naturally crave deeper, more meaningful connections. If you’re ready to find love, this is the ideal moment to take action.

Whether you’re newly single or have been dating for a while without success, working with a professional matchmaker or dating coach this fall can give your search for love a serious advantage. Here’s why matchmaking in the fall works and how to make the most of it.

🍁Fall is the Season of New Beginnings – Even in Dating

Much like the New Year, fall marks a shift into structure, routine, and renewed focus. Kids head back to school, work kicks into high gear, and people become more intentional, including in their relationships.

This is a great time to embrace new beginnings and refresh your dating profile, update your photos, reassess your relationship goals, and commit to getting out to a few singles or general networking events in your city. Fall brings a surge of in-person events and social opportunities in cities like Vancouver, Calgary, Edmonton, or Toronto. Nothing beats the magic of meeting someone face-to-face in a cozy, real-life setting.

🙏Practice Gratitude in Dating to Attract the Right Relationship

Fall is also about reflection and gratitude, especially around Thanksgiving. It’s easy to get caught in the cycle of swiping and disappointment, but a shift in mindset can change your results.

Take a moment to appreciate what you bring to the table. A positive, grateful outlook makes you more attractive and more open to the right connection. Many of our matchmaking clients find that when they focus on self-worth, dating becomes more fulfilling and less frustrating.

🍷Plan Cozy, Seasonal Dates That Spark Connection

Say goodbye to awkward coffee meetups. Fall offers endless date ideas that are both romantic and conversation-friendly:

Enjoy fall colours in Stanley Park, High Park, or along the Bow River

Visit a local pumpkin patch or go apple picking
Attend a cozy wine or coffee tasting

Cook a fall-inspired dish together, like roasted squash soup or a homemade pumpkin pie

As a matchmaking agency, we often suggest experiential dates that naturally build emotional connection and shared memories, which can be more powerful than dinner.

Build Consistency and Momentum Into Your Love Life

Fall’s built-in structure makes it easier to stay consistent and build momentum in your dating journey. Set realistic goals: message two new people a week, attend one singles event per month, or commit to one coffee date outside your usual type.

Hiring a dating coach can help you stay accountable, refine your strategy, and focus on progress over perfection. The goal isn’t to date more; it’s to date smarter. Remember that first dates aren’t about forever — just about getting to date number two.

❤️Stay Open

Cuffing season can come with pressure to settle down fast, but rushing into a relationship rarely leads to lasting love. Instead, focus on building real-life connections while also staying balanced by investing in your own well-being.

Enjoy cozy solo time, self-care, and time with friends. The more grounded and confident you feel, the more likely you are to attract the kind of partner who truly complements you.

Ready to Find Love This Fall?

Fall is all about fresh starts, gratitude, and meaningful connections. It’s the perfect time to put yourself out there and refresh your approach to dating. By staying open, consistent, and confident, you’ll give yourself the best chance of finding someone special before the holidays arrive.

If you’re serious about finding a committed relationship, working with a professional matchmaking service could be the game-changer you need.

At Divine Intervention Matchmaking, we help singles in Vancouver, across BC, Calgary, Edmonton and Toronto find compatible, long-term partners through personalized introductions and expert coaching.

Don’t wait for love to find you — take the first step today.

➡️ Book a free matchmaking Discovery Call now

➡️ Discover how our dating coaches can help you succeed

5 Matchmakers on What Materialists gets right and wrong about the job **Spoilers

This article contains spoilers

Since its release on June 13, there’s already been plenty of discussion as to whether Materialists is more of a romantic comedy or a state of the nation on modern dating. There have also been questions around how well it captures its protagonist’s profession of matchmaking. Well, who better to ask about love, dating, and matchmaking than matchmakers themselves? The age-old tradition is alive and well in New York City. We’ve assembled a crew of five matchmakers—helping singles find the kind of love romantic comedies have made us believe in—to weigh in on how well filmmaker Celine Song’s new movie has captured their jobs.

TIME: Do you think Lucy is a good matchmaker? Why or why not?

Samantha Daniels: When I started, I was essentially Lucy. I was trying to find love for myself while being paid to find love for others—Matchbook, my book, takes place in that period of my life. But it can be hard when you’re navigating your own love life as you’re trying to help other people find love. She starts off well, but as the movie goes on, she becomes burned out, and that takes away from her effectiveness.

Liana Bell: There’s no denying that she seemed to be able to deliver what the client wanted, but maybe not always what they needed. I think Lucy is great at the mathematical component, but it’s not purely mathematical, as she discovers. The bigger component is a creative one, nurtured through intuition as opposed to stats. As Lucy evolved through her lived experience, she began to discover that the checking-boxes approach did not work. Just as the caveman in the movie reinforces, love is easy when it’s kept simple, but it seems we’ve turned it into this complex list of requirements.

Bonnie Winston: I do think she’s a good matchmaker because she acts as a vessel of hope. Her clients come searching for love, and whether they believe it or not, she believes it. Whatever you do in life, if you have someone who believes in you, it can shift your entire perception.

Erin Butler: She’s invested emotionally in her clients. She has heart and she’s vigilant for them. Those are things that matter. However, Lucy says that it’s a smart investment to make big physical changes like that invasive surgery to increase your height. I think that shows a poor side of her matchmaking. I think a lot of what makes matchmaking good is hard work and emotional intelligence.

Maria Avgitidis: No, and the fact that she gets offered a promotion is insane to me. She does things I’d never do or allow my employees to do. First is fraternizing [with clients]. The second is how she takes notes on a match. When I saw the notes she took on the man who assaults his date, I was like, fire her! She has about three sentences, and two of them were quantitative answers, like age and income. We write essays on every potential client because we have to present this metric to make a case for each match. I will never set up a match with a client if that match is not absolutely enthusiastic. Then she stalks the match! Your lawyers would tell you, fire this employee and press charges.

Lucy mentions that burnout is common for matchmakers—what is it about the job that’s so draining?

Butler: It’s a very Hollywood presentation of burnout: OK, you’re burnt out. Go have a four-week vacation. I don’t know if I would call it burnout, but there is no other job quite like this one. You’re dealing with a person’s biggest hopes and dreams, biggest fears. It can be very hard when all that hard work comes crashing down. Or you can’t get past certain hurdles. You don’t have much control. You can’t control how people behave.

Winston: Burnout for me doesn’t exist because I have a staff that does other things. For instance, we have a Director of Client Relations, so she will curate our clients’ dates. I love what I do. I was born to do this. I loved it when I didn’t get paid, and I love it now. I made my first match at 16 years old. I have clergy-like hours; my clients know they can call me seven days a week at any time. I act as a coach, mom, sister, and matchmaker.

Daniels: I’ve been in business for over 20 years, and when I first started, I spoke to various matchmakers who are no longer in the business. They said, you have to be careful. People are investing in you and putting all their hopes and dreams in you. So it feels like a lot of pressure. You have to make sure that everything you do is professional, but the relationship that you have with your clients needs to feel personal. They need to feel like you’re their best friend and their confidant. It’s a lot to handle.

Bell: Burnout is one of the biggest downfalls in the industry. The turnover rates are extremely high. For some people to be managing this many clients and doing this many tasks, it does create an actual burnout.

How much vetting is there with matches? It’s impossible, like Lucy’s boss suggests after her client is assaulted, to know how people will act in an intimate setting.

Bell: We are functioning in the realm of dating, which has an element of the unknown. So while we clearly vet and do a basic background check, interview them, and get a feel for what they’re like, as the movie correctly portrayed, you still don’t know what they’ll be like on a date. What happened in the movie is plausible, sadly, but I haven’t encountered that in my 10 years.

Butler: There are steps in terms of cross-checks and identity verification. We use “blind vetting,” meaning that we get an understanding of someone’s wants/needs/background before we ever present a client to them. While there are markers of character and red flags we use to weed people out, we want clients to follow personal safety measures across the board, because no one can control for behavior in an intimate setting.

Winston: Nothing like that incident has ever [happened] for us. We don’t pretend to be detectives, but we run basic background checks. And everybody should do this, whether they’re meeting somebody online or through a matchmaker. You have to be safe. And the easiest way is to Google someone’s first and last name and write “plaintiff” to see if they’re being sued by anybody.

Avgitidis: We run background checks and really get to know our clients. Lucy’s boss says assault is something that just happens in our industry. I’ve been a matchmaker for nearly 20 years. I’m surrounded by a great, professional network of matchmakers. I don’t know anyone who’s had that experience.

Daniels: That’s a big part of the service, to vet the matches. It’s also getting to know the person and making sure that their value system is in place. You know that they’re honest, there’s no bad press about them. If we come across something negative, whether it’s a reputation or a gut feel thing, I’m not going to send my client up with that person.

Lucy talks a lot about what makes a good match, particularly similar family backgrounds, economic status, etc. Does money play a large role in finding the right match?

Avgitidis: In my book (Ask A Matchmaker), I talk about the five pillars of compatibility. One is financial compatibility. The others are physical, spiritual, intellectual, and emotional. There’s a formula to financial compatibility, and that is how you value the way you spend your time, plus how you value the way you spend your money, equals lifestyle. I have had clients who are billionaires, who still divorce, despite them both being wealthy, because they do not have the same values.

One time, one of my clients got divorced. I asked her what happened. She’s like, “Well, when we went to Paris, I wanted to take a private jet, but he wanted to fly business class. I wanted to stay at the penthouse in the Ritz-Carlton, and he wanted to stay at a local hostel, to live like a local.” They were so misaligned, despite having all the money.

Daniels: Some people think opposites attract, and I do not agree. I think it’s really important that people have a lot of similarities, and that that comes from all different things: background, upbringing, education, value system. Sometimes money can come into play, but that’s more what people are used to, instead of what truly matters.

Winston: Our clients are high-net-worth individuals. We’re very pricey. They’re used to getting what they want, and they have high demands. But they’re different. Some wealthy women are looking for a great companion, and they don’t need to match incomes because they have the money, so they want somebody who respects them, or they just want good chemistry.

Men might want younger women to have children with, and they certainly don’t need a woman who matches their billionaire status. That said, I make matches of all different income levels. Every single client has different dating criteria. They’re as different as snowflakes. I have one client who is a sapiosexual. She gets turned on by super smart guys.

Butler: People do care a lot about money. It’s on everybody’s radar because people care about survival. You could have a successful female client, and they’ve had men who have felt threatened by their success in the past, so they want to correct it. People have reasons why they care about money, and part of our job is to help people correct for that.

Bell: It’s something that I weigh. Socioeconomic backgrounds play a role. But in my belief, culture plays a much greater role. Everyone in the movie was evaluated purely based on their salaries—the movie is titled Materialists. And while we do ask what their yearly income is, I wouldn’t say it’s the driving force, and especially not with men.

What challenges has the rise of dating apps created for the matchmaking process?

Avgitidis: Online dating apps gave people in relationships permission to not participate in dating. Dating was never meant to be a solo activity. I think about my grandmother, who was a matchmaker in Greece during wartime, famine, civil unrest; she was still matching people. People were coming into her house every day. They were drinking good coffee, and they were gossiping. Gossiping is a form of matchmaking. And you had your friends meddling, your parents. That all gets lost in the dating apps.

Winston: It’s a boon for me. People are tired of apps. They hate scrolling, texting, and sexting, and then being disappointed with the deception. So they’ve been great for me!

Daniels: 20 years ago, when I started my business, people were more private about working with a matchmaker. It was like, why do you need to work with a matchmaker? Today, everybody’s using a dating app, and then matchmaking is considered like the Rolls-Royce of alternative ways of meeting. It almost makes people look better that they’re not using apps.

Bell: The novelty of apps is fading. People are inundated with so much screen time that the last thing they want to do is download another app and experience all the ghosting and swiping with diminishing returns. A crucial component that dating apps are missing is picking up on vibe matches. Vibe and energy, in my book, are a crucial part of the process, something an algorithm simply can’t sniff out.

What does Materialists get right about matchmaking?

Winston: What they got right was the unrealistic expectations, especially about age. In the film, there’s an older gentleman who wanted a 27-year-old. I had a guy who’s 72 that wanted children. And I’d say to them, I have this beautiful match who has eggs, and she’s 50. But that was too old! You’re 72, dude—like, what do you want?

Avgitidis: That part of the beginning of the movie where people are barking numbers at you is insanely accurate. That’s what happens!

Butler: The concern over age is very real. The guy who says 30s are okay, but 39 is actually 40, or the other gentleman who won’t date over 27, and Lucy is just looking at him in disbelief. They do get the over-reliance on metrics right. If I could make anything a blind factor, it would be age. I think age gets people very off track. The movie gets that right.

Bell: The unrealistic expectations. People sometimes come to us looking to Build-a-Bear, but it doesn’t work like that! It captures a lot of the obstacles that matchmakers face in finding the right fit for clients with unrealistic expectations and the emotional impact they can have on the matchmaker. It also portrays some of the deeper connections that you can build with clients. The process should be fun, and the film makes sure to showcase a lot of the levity.

Daniels: It shows how people really want to find love. I think that you see that through Lucy’s own quest to find it herself, and then how people are kind of coming to her, and so frantic about wanting to find somebody. People still care about love, it’s still there and people desperately want it.

What does Materialists get wrong about matchmaking?

Winston: Everybody is a character archetype. If they showed all the normal people, they’d have no movie. In my business, I choose people that are genuinely lovely, and they just want to find love at the end of the day. But that wouldn’t make a very good movie.

Daniels: It feels like they trivialize it a little bit too much. I think it’s hard to show in a movie, unless it’s like a documentary, exactly how deep the business is and how it’s a full-bodied thing. People think that it’s just this willy-nilly easy thing to do, but it’s not. There’s a science to it.

Avgitidis: Lucy has no sense of community. She doesn’t have friends! I love matchmaking. It’s all I know how to do. Most of my employees have been matchmakers for over 10 years. And we were excited about this movie because it could be validating, but we were left disappointed. Like, where’s your community? Where is the community building?

Celine Song worked at Tawkify, which is more of a dating service [with many more clients]. At Agape, we take 15 clients at a time. So, of course, they only talk in numbers, because you don’t have time for conversation! The film loses the human element of matchmaking. In the one scene where the client calls Lucy a pimp, I sunk into my chair and started to cry. For the first time in my nearly 20-year career, I felt embarrassed to be a matchmaker.

Bell: The movie touches on this term that gets flung around a lot in our industry: Unicorn. I think that term is a load of BS. Every single person is awesome and weird in their own way. To me, everybody’s a unicorn.

Butler: I don’t think height is as much of an issue as they make it in the film, but I think psychologically it probably is for men. Men will always think that their height is going to be an issue, but 80% of the women I talk to want someone who’s kind of, you know, they’re height or taller. I would say closer to only 20% of them really care about height.

I think they also simplify the money equation. At the end of the day, she’s going to be fine because she’s getting a big promotion, and her guy is going to try harder, but the idea that you’re choosing between a superficial, loveless existence or love with poverty doesn’t ring true.

One of the surprising details in Materialists is a surgery that can add up to 6 inches in height. Do you have any stories about the wild things clients have done to improve their odds?

Winston: I signed a lovely woman, and she was overweight. We were having issues. Even the men who were overweight themselves and had dad bods only wanted someone slender. She went on Ozempic, and when we had lunch three months later, she was 35 pounds lighter. Then we started getting her matches. It’s a complete game changer in the world of dating. 50 years ago, it was rhinoplasty, 10 years ago it was lip fillers, and now it’s weight loss injectables.

Butler: I’m not really seeing that specifically. I haven’t seen a trend of people running out to get surgery. But social media creates a landscape with endless comparing that can be extremely painful. With the app culture, and swiping culture, people are very image focused.

Avgitidis: I think the biggest way to change your odds is to increase your capacity for empathy. If I notice that a client is very close-minded and conservative, I will also ask them to read two fiction books. And if they do it, their mindset changes. The moment you read fiction, especially if it’s written by a woman, it shows you a different perspective from a character. And you do build the pillars of empathy this way, and it makes you a far more appealing match.

Daniels: I didn’t like the thing about the six inches. I felt like it was kind of making fun of the process. I’d have cut the whole thing. I have seen people go and get surgery done before they start dating. Whether it’s an eye lift or having Botox, I think that it’s just people deciding that they’re going to put the best version of themselves out there.

Dating Realistically: What You Want vs. What Actually Works

Is your dating wish list helping you find love or holding you back? In this episode of The Morning After with Krys, two matchmakers, Krys and Susan from Divine Intervention Matchmaking, sit down for a real and hilarious conversation about what people say they want in a relationship versus what actually works. They share what it’s really like behind the scenes of matchmaking, what they’ve learned from years of working with clients, and how things like long checklists, perfectionism, and fear of vulnerability can keep people stuck. From dating in the wild to life as a matchmaker, this episode is full of laughs, insights, and a few tough-love truths for anyone navigating modern dating.

See the full episode here:

Matchmaking and Reversing The Paradox of Choice

A Book-Inspired Blog

How Divine Intervention handles serial-dating mentality and the notion of quality VS. quantity

American psychologist Barry Schwartz powerfully sums up the challenge we face when choosing a romantic partner in today’s world in his 2004 novel The Paradox of Choice: Why More Is Less.
paradox-of-choice-dating The whole idea behind Schwartz’s book is that people assume that more choices gives one more freedom to make decisions which then lead to greater welfare. This idea is flawed—especially when it comes to dating—and Schwartz suggests we should opt for being “satisficers” making good enough choices, which will lead to happier lives, as opposed to being “maximizers” who need to exhaust all choices before making a decision. In addition, Schwartz claims maximizers are usually left feeling doubtful about their choice even after having made one.

As matchmakers at Divine Intervention, our job is to reverse the paralysis current and prospective clients experience during the matchmaking and early-stage dating process.

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